An overdue THANK YOU

This is far overdue, but as I said in the last post, and as you keep reading in this one, there are reasons it's overdue. I want to thank everyone who reached out to me in various ways after the blog post about my recent pregnancy. It was very helpful to have that support and it was good to know so many care! So thank you, even just for reading my blog and listening to what I had to say. Just like it took a little courage to write that blog post, I know it takes courage to reach out in uncomfortable situations so thanks for your courage and kind words, no matter how they came- even if they only came to me through your prayers. I sure felt them~


HOUSE UPDATE
Not to be cliche' or anything, but Wow, life is sure a RoLLeR cOasTer for Scott and I right now, a very tall one with STEEP drop offs. At first I'm pregnant, then I'm not. At first we're buying a home, and now we may not be. There is a lot that's going into it and hopefully by the end of today we'll have more answers, but when everything's said and done, hopefully we'll still end up getting to live in this cute little house that we found on Galveston Island, only 1/2 a mile from UTMB campus.

Because we are going to be SO close to campus, we've decided to sell our Honda Civic. (Click here for more info). We just put the ad up yesterday and have had several calls already. I have high hopes that it should go fast, but you never know- this may be another high point in this coaster that we're on where the next direction is down again. That seems to be the trend with anything good happening in our lives right now. BUT, that is the logic of a puny, pessimistic and temoral perspective.
I KNOW everything will work out; Our home, our future baby/s, selling our car. As I see how things are coming together, not as I would have them but as God would, I can see how His perspective of our past, present, and FUTURE are determining how His hand is playing in our lives today. I didn't want to sell our 2nd car, but if we kept it, it would sit in our driveway eating up insurance money and depreciating in value until it's time to upgrade to a family size car in a few years anyway. Over the last few months Scott has gotten a free bike, and a free moped, and we've found a place to live only 1/2 mile from campus. Also, we need the $3000 that the car is worth to help us with some of the upfront costs of buying a house. It's all coming together and it all is making sense.

At this time, I'm going to keep my mouth shut as far as what is happening with the house because things can and have been changing like THAT and I don't want to speak too soon before I know the outcome. But however it does work out, the point is that it WILL work out. And when it all comes together, I will be able to see why it did work out the way it did and why it's for the best for us.

As far as the ups of this roller-coaster, I have lot's of PICTURES to post from the last 2 weeks of being MIA- from our trip to Texas/Galveston, to being a mom of twins for a week to the Color Run etc.. but I'm going to create a separate post for all that fun stuff starting now..

THANKS AGAIN!

WE BOUGHT A HOUSE!!

And thus, the reason I have been a slacker at blogging for the last 2 weeks. We found the house the first day we were on Galveston and went under contract the 2nd day. Today (day 3), we are in Dallas to pick Syd up and spend an unexpected bonus day or two with family here before heading back for our final month in KC.

I will make a more official post during our road trip from Dallas to KC if I'm not still slacking, but I just wanted to throw that exciting news out there and let you know why we've been MIA lately.

I was pregnant...

Yes. I was. You would have gotten a much different announcement of it in a few more weeks.

We announced this one to our family just this past Friday with this video:

Two days later, I miscarried.

Everything went perfect with Syd; pregnancy and birth. We expected it to be the same the 2nd time around. It was. We got pregnant right away again, just as we hoped for. To me, that meant another perfect pregnancy.

Scott felt different about it. From the beginning he suspected something was not right. He just had a weird feeling. He wouldn't even completely believe the pregnancy tests until the 3rd positive.

I on the other hand, wasn't even concerned with things you hear about like the dangers of miscarriage. I was with Syd- I think that just comes with the territory of first-time moms-to-be, and because it was so smooth the first time, I was too relaxed about that possibility this time.

When I went in to the doctor on Monday, he made it very clear to me that no matter what the results were, "There is nothing you did to make this happen." 1 in 6 pregnancies end up in miscarriages; it's a natural part of reproduction, and to most women, they never even know they were pregnant; they think it is nothing more than a late period. But I knew better.

I was worried Sunday when it began, and even after the doctor told me he was concerned on Monday, I held my ground. I was let down,  bummed, a little embarrassed even, but I was prepared to accept that we'd lost this baby.

I'm not one to break down very often. I did break down, Monday night, after Scott gave me a priesthood blessing for comfort. We were to get my blood test results back the next day, but I already knew the outcome.  It was then that I let loose and everything became a reality. I learned that I was to rely on my husband who wants to be so much a part of everything in my life, and also that I'd learn more deeply the Plan of Salvation by experiencing it myself. Hearing that was all I needed to know.

Then I cried for the next day and a half. It was literally out of my control, the fact that I cried. This is the weird part, the part I didn't expect. The best way I can explain it, is that mentally, I had accepted it and I was fine and ready to move on. I was grateful it happened earlier on in pregnancy and not later. I knew that it happened for a reason and somehow it was probably a blessing in disguise, if nothing more than to make my character stronger and more sympathetic toward others. Mentally, I didn't need to mourn like I would if it had been Sydney instead, But it was as if my body and spirit were mourning beyond my control. I could literally feel my body and spirit mourning for me and I'd cry and not know why; I'd just cry and want to go lay down or just be still and not move.

In honor of that sweet spirit that we didn't get to meet in this life, I write this post, and for some reason I haven't been able to focus on much until I've written this. Getting things in writing has always provided some sort of closure for me. We are fine and feel very blessed. I look at Sydney as more of a miracle than I did before and I know that feeling will be the same with each little miracle that gets to join our little family. Now that saying is no longer a cliche', it's a reality. Children really are miracles!

 I got this in a fortune cookie on Monday night- it was very fitting and cute; a tender mercy. 

We will get our "moment" some day!

LIEUTENANT WALTON

Brace yourself, it was another eventful weekend. I'll start with the most life-changing event...

We did it! Scott took the Oath of Office last Friday June 8th and was officially sworn in to the US Army some 100 feet high on the Shawnee Mission Park Observation Tower. 

 She's fearless

Gettin' a lesson on how to pound the bar pins (without the backs) into his collar for after he took the oath. It's tradition. 

                      TAKING THE OATH

I had the honor of pinning him

Bam! I pounded that thing just like I was trained :) Jk, I could only make myself tap it...

..because I love him :)

 Meet Lieutenant Walton!

          It's a little weird transitioning from the civilian world to the military world, even though it won't really hit us for four more years. First off, all the military guys immediately started calling Scott "Sir" because he outranked a few of them. Second off, we're not used to the awesome insurance discounts and other benefits yet, but we'll take it! He'll go to school as normal for the next four years and then report at a military base hospital to do his residency. After residency he'll owe 4 years more. So we'll be in the military world for the next 12 years, even though we won't realize it until residency starts and we have to move to base. 

Right now he's commissioned as Lieutenant in the IRR- Inactive Ready Reserves, and will be active at the end of these next 4 years. 

There are many reasons why we chose this to be a great route for our family, the least of which may even be the pay. I'm sure you'll hear about all those things as they come; until then, THANK YOU ARMY for paying for Med. school. 

X FACTOR TICKETS

We got free tickets through On Camera Audiences to the taping of X Factor auditions (singing competition show like American Idol) while they were here in Kansas City last weekend. 

To be honest, I have never seen the show, only heard of it and I figured if Simon Cowell and Britney Spears were a part of it it was worth going to, especially for free! 

Simon Cowell was "under the weather" for our Friday night taping which was pretty lame but Britney, Demi Lovato, and L.A. Reid were still the judges of the night. It was interesting to see what it was like before all the editing takes place- a lot longer and drawn out with more breaks to reapply makeup and get drinks. Other than that, it could have been an impressive church talent show. 

I learned that Britney Spears was always "bored" and didn't have as much of a personality as I would have liked for someone to have, and Demi Lovato was always "on the fence," which got old to hear after seriously about 25 times of hearing it. You KNOW they'll be editing all that repetitiveness out for the show. It's definitely more exciting to see a movie star or famous musician when they are the one performing. L.A. had great things to say and I only wish Simon had not been sick. 

After the editing, the lights, music, large crowd and presence of Hollywood stars, the TV shows seem like a bigger deal than they were when they were taped. I guess it's all a big deal though, especially the 4 million $ and life changing future involved for the winner! 

 Wow, Mike. Way to make everyone look like midgets ;)

 We're famous

 Michelle and Jeff

 Mike and Mel

 Matt, Heather, Me, Scotty and Mich

 Total church talent show. These girls actually came together at their church.

 Britney Spears

Fun night :)

It really was a busy weekend; the kind where everything is fun but you can't help but be either annoyed that there's another place you have to be or stressed out because you just want to sit and do nothing. Besides Scott being commissioned as an officer, and the X-Factor show, there were two separate family birthday celebrations and we also had a neighborhood garage sale which we participated both Friday and Saturday.

And yes, that is where we got Sydney's 50 cent outfit from last post which actually cost less than 50 cents because we bought so much (each item at 25 cents, we couldn't control ourselves!). The grandpa talked his daughter into selling as much as we could fit into a box for 5 bucks. So we filled two. Syd is gonna be one well dressed baby until she's size 3T. That was definitely a once-in-a-lifetime jack-pot garage sale- awesome stuff for a steal (and a lot of it still had tags!). We were grateful for the little neighbor girl who had a grandma who spoiled her rotten with way to many super cute clothes, shoes, swimsuits and dresses.

          We finished off the weekend with this awesomeness. It was a going away party for my two brothers in laws' cousin (two brothers married my two sisters..).

Adult Slip 'N Slide, Anyone?!

 Syd LOVED it! She kept asking for "More? More?!"

 Scott clearly won that race...

Waiting patiently in line... :)

Sydney rocked the Adult slip 'n slide

 A random snake that decided to join the party...

 Told ya! FEARLESS!! She gave him a little tap, tap.

Good times. It's been nice to rest a little this week.

Daddy Did Sydney's Hair for Church

He used my straightener, my hair pins and hairspray. This may be one of the first times she's ever worn her hair down as a style. She looks so much older! She looks so cute. I'm going to have to start having him do my hair!

Oh, and just to give you a little foreshadowing for the next post, (which will happen soon enough with some very exciting events...) that dress - 25c; shoes - 25c. 

What baby can dress better than that for 50 CENTS?! 

Next Post Preview:

Caught Red-Handed

She disappeared for a couple of long minutes that were waaaaay too quiet and suspicious. 

We found her like this, in the act, at the scene of our secret closet candy stash. Now that she's discovered it, she always runs to our closet door any chance she can get and before closing the door on us waves at us and says "Bye, bye."

Then ::SLAM. WRINKLE, WRINKLE::

Ha, so chubby. She has chocolate drool dripping from her lips. :) That's my girl!

Memorial Day Weekend

Before I post the pictures that I promised at the end of last post, I must comment on some funny things from the last couple days:

1. I came home from work on Tuesday and told Scott I posted on my blog and he should read it.
He asked me what it was about.
          "YOU!" I said to him. (Same answer I gave him the last time I posted and a few times before too).
          "Oh my gosh. You've gotta stop writing blog posts about me; It's so embarrassing! I'm going to stop doing  nice things for you so you can't blog about them."
I started laughing.
          "It's not funny, it's the truth! You can't reveal all my secrets!"

2. I learned a valuable life lesson while jogging yesterday morning. Never give your kid blueberries in the stroller...especially when they have white pants on.

3. After our run, Sydney decided she should wear my shoes and I should wear hers. It was cute to begin with; I even humored her and stuck what I could of my foot into one of her tiny silver sandals. She tried desperately to get the ankle straps to cross over my foot let alone strap them together and started freaking out when they wouldn't. I tried to explain to her in baby language the best I could that they won't fit but she just kept chasing me around the kitchen in my big floppy tennis shoes, holding her sandals at me and screaming so loud so that I would somehow make her tiny sandals fit my big, adult-sized, Cinderella's step sister foot for like 10 minutes straight! Funny baby. I love her. :)

Here are pictures from the BBQ-filled weekend. Not shown is the family BBQ at Mel's house and the pool party BBQ. These below are mostly from the block party BBQ.

He fits the part well, doesn't he?!

Time to crash this party!!

"Oh my goodness; Can you believe this?!"

 

"Time to take matters into my own hands. Outta the way, fake cop car!"

"Um...daddy!!! DADDY!!!!

The firemen let Mel climb to the top of their ladder and get some sweet shots.

There she is! Don't worry, she's only 8 months pregnant and super uncoordinated and unbalanced. 

Aunt Shell

Fully clothed...

Might as well not be clothed...

aaaaaand NAKED BABY!!!! with a diaper

Sooo much fattness aaalll weekend loooong

Remembering Aunt Jennifer and G-ma Welling on Memorial Day

Pre Ring-Around-The-Rosie warm-ups

I've never seen so many American flags in one place. This was very cool to see! It was right off the highway.

Flag pictures courtesy of Melissa

Grandpa tellin' a lil' bit about the past

Cute cousins! They are friends :)

Later in the evening when it was absolutely PERFECT outside we all went blueberry picking in a friends blueberry field...It was so fun!!

Reminded me of when we were kids ourselves...