Wednesday, December 5, 2012

It Happened Overnight

For all those who struggle putting their kids to bed at night, who need a testimony booster, or who could solve more problems by spending quality time with their family more often.

They say people can't change overnight.
Sydney did.
It not only changed her nights and days, but ours as well.

Remember that short little blog I posted more than a month ago about our struggle with Sydney and bedtime? It was really a struggle, I may have even cried to Scott about it a time or two.
You better take a refresher- it's a very short post. click HERE

Ok, welllllllll, I think it's been long enough to report that an impressive 37 days has gone by since that night and NOT ONE TEAR AT BEDTIME. Not even a fight! It would take me sometimes 2 hours to finally get her down. Ridiculous, and draining; emotionally and physically.

Here's what we did,
specific to our little Sydney. 
This is what she needed. 

FHE = Family Home Evening- one night in a week dedicated to being together and strengthening our family relationships.

1. We decided FHE would be an excellent tool for helping us with Sydney's going to bed issue. And this proved to be true. Though it only took the one FHE lesson, we still do numbers 2. and 3. every day since that night when everything changed. :)

To make it totally understandable for Sydney, Scott drew pictures of what he was talking about as he talked about them with her, in a way any young child could understand. He gave a great lesson on the good things that come from sleeping. He emphasized things Sydney would think were the best outcomes. Then, we did the normal bedtime routine and Sydney got in her bed- the point where we'd say goodnight and the nightmare would normally begin.
BUT, we stayed.
 We sat next to her in her bed, and invested a few minutes more of our evening with her. We reviewed what we learned for FHE. We re-emphasized the "good" things or what was most important to her- like 1. becoming a "BIG girl," bigger and bigger, every day because of sleeping (and eating), and 2. being happy.

These next two things, are what we continue to do daily/nightly, since that night:

2. She enjoyed this little chatting time we had sitting on her bed, after reading at least 3 books already, and her normal bedtime routine.
So we turned this time, right after books and prayer into a time to talk with her about her day. Talk about what we did and ask her questions about it. We listen for her responses.

Now, every night she excitedly climbs into bed and says "Momma talk [to] Sydney?!" and then she starts the conversation out as I used to when we first started this... "So? How's [was] [your] day? ... " She loves it- and it's definitely one of my favorite times of the day too. :)
It's really a precious opportunity that I know won't last for ever.

3. When I get up to leave her room and close the door behind me, this is not my final "Good night." I think she was feeling stranded and alone when we'd leave her room, before. We'd always end up back in her room by default of her crying/screaming and there were many "Good nights" in one evening, against our will. This new, second goodnight, is planned and promised to Sydney. Before I walk out, now I let her know that

"Mommy's going to come back and check on you in 5 minutes, Ok?" 
And then I do. 

There is comfort in knowing I'm close by, close enough to come back and check on her after I walk out. When I come back in, she stays quiet and lets me kiss her on the cheek. Then I say "I love you" once more and walk out for the rest of the night.

We were blessed to discover this 'new way' because we were seeking help from the Lord and made it a point to have FHE on this particular night about this particular issue, and were inspired to do these particular things.
As a family- 
we all are finally on the same page,
when going to bed each night- 
not just Scott and I.

Just think of how our family could benefit if we had FHE every week, like we are instructed!
What are other issues, stuggles, or problems that we can solve, simply by finding and spending quality time as a family to discuss and resolve, to learn and to grow, and to love and strengthen each of our relationships as a family?

What a blessing that one night of FHE was and still is to us.

She signed her name, and changed,


  1. That is so awesome. It is amazing what TIME and TOGETHERNESS can do. I notice such a difference in our home when I spend the time I should being a mom and being with Liza and following routines and the direction the Lord has given us. The most important thing we can do for our kids is be with them, talk with them, invest in them, love them, support them...and then let them grow. It's amazing what they are capable of! I am SO glad this has gone so well for you! Thanks for sharing!

    1. So true!!! Spending time is so important. Thanks Ash!

  2. This is an awesome way that y'all were able to figure out what your daughter needs. I enjoy reading your blogs! How do you guys like Texas?

    1. Thanks Joan! We like Texas! This is where we met and dated until we got married so it's already a 2nd home to me. You are from Tx I remember talking about you riding horses at a ranch or something in the summers. What part are you from? We have family in Dallas/Euless. How are you liking Pennsylvania?

  3. This is awesome. I'm really impressed. We have been really struggling with FHE lately. Cam gets home after the boys are asleep a lot and I just haven't had it in me to fly solo that way yet. I need to. And I think this post has inspired me. What a blessing!

    1. We struggle with FHE all the time...but the worst part is we don't realize we are until we decide we should do one and realize it's been weeks, months even! It really is a blessing though! I'm missin out on a LOT of blessings each week we don't do it! It's like rejecting a million bucks once a week- even getting it just once is amazing! But we can have so much more! (speaking non-money..) hah

  4. I have been following your a non stockerish way...and I just want to tell youthat you guys are awesome!! I am seriously inspired by your faith and strength. We are struggling with this same thing, so I really appreciated this post.

    1. haha you are funny- I'm glad you read it! That's why I post it on FB. Thanks for reading it. I'm glad you can relate with this struggle and maybe find some hope!! haha it can be so hard! Hang in there- it will pass... :)


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